I’ve had to return to my day job of driving a school bus. Managing the passenger seating for Covid really brings it home that life as I knew it is forever gone. The Wildfires raging across the USA, the fights for equality and racial justice in our city streets, and the Covid: These are heartbreaking. But I must go on. My family needs the income I provide. I need the income I provide. Managing my emotions around the uncertainty and change is not always easy, but I do it because no one else needs my shit.
I manage my emotions through a process of prayer and gratitude. With the Earth burning, I remember to give heartfelt “Thank you” for all that is green, growing, and wet. The best part of my life has been spent in forests and under trees. With people dying, I remember to give heartfelt “Thank you” for my family and those people I love who are still available to me. With the income now coming in, I say “Thank you” for this prosperity toward the winter ahead.
It is not always easy to rise above fear. I strive to do this as best as I can. Taking it one day at a time, as Mikao Usui taught: Just for today. Just for today, I will do the best that I can for as long as I can.